img @ api.ning.com

When you’re young (I’m thinking, 15 or 16) and you start dating, it’s quite possibly one of the most exciting times of your life. Not only do you fall in love at the drop of a hat, but you often forget all about the very real potential that this person, your first love, isn’t your only love.

However, resisting the desire to up and get married the second you think you’re in love is the smartest thing you can do. A recent article in The Daily Beast by Anneli Rufus discusses many statistics about the likelihood of divorce, and what is one of the leading causes of divorce? Marrying too young. She says in the article,

If you’re a woman who got married before the age of eighteen, your marriage faces a 48 percent likelihood of divorce within ten years.

Age matters. Study after study shows that the younger the married couple, the riskier the bond. The risk drops to 40 percent for women who married at age eighteen or nineteen, drops further to 29 percent for women who married at age 20 to 24, and drops even further to 24 percent for women who married at age 25 or older.

So slow it down, young ones. This first intense love you’re feeling may feel great, but trust us when we say it won’t be the last!

img @ sheknows

We all have pet-peeves… little details that for no understandable reason just irk us more than others. Some people are very demanding about the brand of their toilet paper, others can’t stand when people get up during a movie to use the bathroom. And while you may be caught off guard by a person’s crazy quirks, there are a few habits in dating that are almost universally hated.

1) Monopolizing the conversation

There should be a decent give and take between two people, especially on a first date. Of course you want to share information about yourself, and give your date a good idea of what kind of person you are, but over-sharing, exaggerating, bragging about your life experiences or just generally trying to sound too smart is an instant turn of for almost anyone in the dating world.

2) Talking about your ex

No one, I can promise you, no one likes hearing all about their date’s ex situation. If you’ve just gotten out of a relationship, you can of course mention this, but going on a 10 minute rant about how depressed you were or how much you hate your ex is an ultimate downer.

3) Getting overly sexual

Especially if you’re having a quiet dinner at a nice restaurant, no matter how good you think your chemistry is, dropping creepy sexual innuendo into every other sentence is going to do the opposite of what you intend it to.

4) Pushing on a wall

If you are very interested, but can tell that your date isn’t really all that into it, it’s probably a good idea to back off. You know exactly how it feels when a person pursues you that you are uninterested in, so don’t push that kind of awkwardness on your date. The harder you push, the more they’ll back away.

5) Pushing your ideas and beliefs on people

It’s great to have passions. Whether they are spiritual, political, or any other -al. However, a first date is the last place you want to start spouting those. Further on in the dating game your date may find it attractive that you’re a passionate person about whatever cause you stand for, but it will come off as too forward and very unpleasant.

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Now that the cold season is over and Summer is nearly upon us, it’s time to think up some new ideas for Summer date ideas. Indoor cozy dinners and wine by a fireplace are no longer acceptable, and the opportunities for summer fun are practically endless! Here are a few of DatePro’s favorite Summer date ideas.

1) Car wash:

Nothing like a sudsy car wash in the hot sun to create some sexy, soapy fun. Not only will you be saving some dough by washing your car yourself, but 9 times out of 10, it will lead to some bedroom action, too.

2) Oceanic activites

Whether it be the more exciting jet skiing or the more relaxed kayaking, being on the water together can be a great experience. And the more daring the sport, the more adrenaline you pump, and the higher your libido will peak .

3) The drive-in movie theater

The Summertime is when it’s finally warm enough to sit outside at night, and watching a good old fashioned horror movie on a Summer night is a cute, fun way to get close to your date.

4) Hiking

Taking a drive up to a nearby mountain or trail path can be a fun, quiet way to get a workout while being away from the loud noises of the city, enabling you to talk and enjoy each other’s company.

5) An amusement park

While they might be aimed more at kids, a fun day at Disneyland, Six Flags, or even a local amusement park, is romantic and will remind you of being a teenager in love. Take tons of pictures and you’ll have great memories of your time together!

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Blind dates are the dating world’s equivalent to sky diving or bungee jumping. You have no idea what you’re getting into, you’re nervous and afraid that one screw up could ruin the whole experience (although I suppose you probably wouldn’t die).

Just as with jumping out of a plane or off a platform, there are certain steps you should take to mentally and physically prepare yourself for the excitement that is blind dating… here are a few tips to get your nerves under control, whether you’re meeting a family friend or someone a pal met on Match.com.

1) Get dressed up

Feeling good about the way you look is the first step to enjoying yourself. When you feel attractive, you’re more likely to be confident and self-assured on your date.

2) Drop your expectations

Decide to have fun no matter what the night brings. If anything, your date could be a complete psychopath with no common decency. But hey- imagine the great stories you’ll have for your friends!

3) Laugh

There is always something funny to find in a situation, even if it’s awkward. By letting your serious face go and just enjoying the moment, you’ll find times to laugh and have fun, even if it’s because they’ve had broccoli in their teeth for 30 minutes.

4) Drop the insecurity

Even if you feel uncomfortable with your new haircut or think you won’t be attractive enough for them, keep your head up and don’t bother feeling insecure. On a blind date, it’s your one time to realize that you’ve got NOTHING to lose.

5) Watch the alcohol

A few glasses of wine will loosen you up. 6 of them will make you sloppy and unattractive. Sip slowly and don’t lose your cool, you’ll have a great night!

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No matter how many cheesy romantic comedies you see where the handsome, dashing lead man falls for the dorky girl in glasses, the truth remains that looks are and always will be important in attraction. Plus, the movies have a catch- most nerds don’t look like Jessica Alba.

Single or not, think about the last time you felt extreme attraction for someone of the opposite sex, either in person or on a dating site like Chemistry.com. Now name the three things that you remember liking the most. And don’t lie and say “they were really nice,” because you know that’s not the initial attraction. It was probably their beautiful eyes, a svelte figure, or a great smile. And while you probably eventually fell for their great personality, almost 100% of the time the first heart pounds come from some physical aspect.

Don’t think that this means you have to try and fit into some mold that Hollywood hot bods have created. However, hitting the gym and sprucing up your wardrobe can do wonders for your dating life. Don’t forget your personality matters too, though, so read a book while you ride a stationary bike, because even the hottest men and women can be ruined by a crappy personality.

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We’ve spent a lot of time on this blog discussing the numerous ways that women sabotage first dates, and we realize that maybe our attempts at dishing advice are making dating seem more a hassle than fun! Here, we’re going to take a more positive approach, explaining a few of the great things you can do that will make your date go great!

1) Eat.

If you’re out to dinner, the last thing a guy wants is for you to take three bites of your $30 entree and leave the rest. Eat! Enjoy your dinner and show that you like eating. Although we’ve come to a point in life where eating is more a necessity than a past time, history and science show that eating together can be gratifying and pleasurable.

2) Laugh

You can always tell when a person is fake laughing. It comes out forced and unnatural. So don’t take this advice as a hint to be obnoxious or superficial. But if something is funny, laugh! There is no need to hide your mouth or try to play it coy. Guys like a girl who’s not afraid to have fun even if she looks a little silly.

3) Be a good listener

There seems to be some misunderstanding among humans that only women ever want to be listened to. Although ladies do like to talk (and will usually admit it), it doesn’t mean your date doesn’t want you to hear his part too. He might patiently sit there waiting for a break in conversation, but he probably has something to share too. So quiet down and ask him questions, too, and he’ll be glad to go on a second date with you.

4) Be polite to the service people

Whether it’s a server, busser, host, or valet guy, being polite to the people waiting on you is a great sign. Even if you think you’re receiving poor service, be patient and polite. Being understanding and composed will show your date you’re not one to blow up over little things. If you lose it when the waiter brings you ranch instead of Italian dressing, he’s gonna be wondering how many other things you’ll blow up over.

5) Pick your topics wisely

Spencer and Heidi’s reality show or your best friends recent breast augmentation should probably remain as friend-conversation. Instead, be prepared with some interesting questions or conversation starters, like about high school hobbies, what sports the like, or traveling. Showing that you’ve got interests away from MTV will be a huge turn on. (Side note: Probably keep the “religion/politics” talk for date 5, you don’t wanna scare him off!)

img @ loving you

First dates. Ah, the awkward, the exciting, the nerve-wracking hours when you’re not even dating, you’re just… on a date. Where small comments can make or break the next date and a weird sneeze can make you die with embarrassment. The best things to say on a first date are debatable, but there are some definite DON’Ts that we should all follow.

1) “I hate my job/life/parents”

Keep the negativity out! While you don’t need to pretend your job shoveling horse crap is your life’s goal, by highlighting the positive parts and expressing your hopeful wishes for the future, you steer clear of looking like a grouch.

2) “I want to have at least 3 kids by the time I’m 30″

Guy or lady, setting your expectations on the table within the first hours of meeting a person can be intimidating, and a major turn-off. Unless you met on Match.com and are both looking for a quick marriage, keep the conversation light-hearted for the time being.

3) “Nice shirt, does it come in a guy’s size?”

Your sarcasm might fly with your friends who think it’s a key aspect of your personality, but busting out your scathing wit on a first date could kill the mood and make your date think you’re a real jerk.

4) ” A public health care option is socialism” (or anything politically damning)

I’ve always been opposed to the rule that dinner parties should avoid talking about sex and politics, as they can get a group of people into rousing conversation. However, on your first date with someone, saying something extremely far to the left, right, or whatever direction you skew could ruin the date in a very uncomfortable fashion. Even if your date tries to get you to share your opinions, make them in as least-confrontational a manner as possible.

5) “I can’t eat that. I’m on a diet.”

Nothing makes a woman look more high-maintenance or a guy more self-centered than saying no to sharing a dessert or an appetizer because they’re on a diet. It’s great you’re watching your waistline and that health is important to you, but for goodness sake just cut back on the calories tomorrow, or risk your date being really turned off.

img @disasterdate

You got up the courage and asked out that attractive someone from Matchmaker.com. After a 2 hour dinner, all you can say is that you had nothing in common, he said he preferred blondes when you are clearly a brunette, or she  spit when she talked. But somehow your news-worthy awful first date still thought a second one was in order. In this case, you are going to have the unfortunate duty of rejecting the second date, which can be awkward and sometimes almost sad. Here is our guide to rejecting a second date.

1. Be nice

This might seems like an obvious one, but let the person down nicely. Throw in a “You’re a really nice girl” or a “I know you’ll find a nice girl” somewhere so that they don’t leave and hang themself from a lamppost somewhere.

2. Be honest

Don’t drop a “it’s not you, it’s me,” because it’s not true. Something about them irked you, and while you don’t have to say “the way you ate made me nauseas,” you should say, “I just didn’t feel any chemistry.” The bottom line is, if you don’t be honest about disliking them, they’ll probably still chase a second date, and having to reject them a second time is going to be terrible.

3. Be assertive

They may try and weasel in a comment about how they were nervous, or that you should try again, but you must put your foot down now, lest they leave 20 voicemails promising to be better or show up at work demanding a second date. By saying “No,” you’ll be free to move on with your life- most likely to another first date you’ll have to reject again.

img @ AskMen

The awkward goodbye after a first date can be really nerve-racking. What do you say? Will there be a kiss? Some hooking up? Maybe you’ll just flat-out get it on cause you met on LavaLife… who knows until you get there. However, if you are planning on ending the date at someone’s front door, your parting words could be an essential factor in whether or not there is a second date. Go with what feels right, but definitely do NOT say any of DatePro’s worst things to say on a first date.

1) “I’ll call you Friday!”

So innocent, you think! But in reality, by setting such a certain date for the next contact, you’re screwing up in two areas: 1) You’re making it “not okay” for them to call you, and 2) You’re not being spontaneous. What if something comes up, or what if you have a great idea for a fun date before then? The fun part of dating is the unknown, and the excitement. By already creating a routine, you’re moving your relationship forward a hefty 6 months. Not fun.

2) ANYTHING that hints at a future.

We know you’d never say, “We can look back on this day on the night of our marriage…” but we seriously mean anything that hints at a future for the two of you, even if it is “I heard you like Thai food, I should take you to this great little place next time…” No. No no no. Women and men both enjoy the thrill of the challenge when they begin dating a person. By leaving it up in the air whether you will meet again, you’re enhancing the excitement and pushing your date to work for your affections.

3) “Do you like me?”

This phrase translates quite simply into “I am extremely insecure.” For either a man or a woman, this is second-date kryptonite, as in a sure fire way to ensure you’ll never get anywhere with them. Assume that they like you (cause who wouldn’t?) and act like it. Confidence beats shyness every time.

After a great first date, the last thing you wanna do is say something that will negate any possibility of a second date. Avoiding these phrases will help you out a whole lot.

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There used to be a time when there were set standards for dating- don’t call her right after a first date, wait three dates before sex, blah, blah, blah. It’s finally come to a time where people realize that the question “how long should you wait before having sex?” is practically like asking “how long is a piece of string?” in that there is no right answer.

Sex on the first date, though, is tricky. Some guys say they lose respect for a girl if she goes “all the way” on the first date, and some women feel offended if a guy even tries. To make a judgement call on either part isn’t really appropriate, because everyone views sex differently. For example, on sites like AdultFriendFinder, you’ll probably find a date who assumes sex with happen… But if you meet on BigChurch, that will probably not be the case. The only way to really decide if it’s okay is if you both feel comfortable with the idea.

If maybe you had one too many drinks and you slept with your date when you truly planned on waiting, that’s okay. The last thing you want to say, though, is “I don’t usually do this.” Even if its true, it comes off sounding more like “I do this, and then say this, all the time.” You guys had a fun date, and things got steamy, there is nothing wrong with it. Laugh it off, because if anything, you got a great date, some between-the-sheets fun, and never had to deal with the awkwardness of “the first time.”