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Having personal space in a relationship is important, as we have discussed before, however there is an important aspect of personal space that should be analyzed further: privacy. It’s easy to fall into a rhythm in a relationship where you think it’s acceptable to be involved in every aspect of your mate’s life, and feel threatened when you aren’t. On the contrary, one of the keys to having a successful relationship is retaining some semblance of your independent life, and one of the ways to do this is keeping some parts of your life private.

Our top 3 rules for keeping your privacy in a relationship might seem tough to follow, but they’ll make your relationship healthier and your help you keep your sanity.

1. Never read each others texts or e-mails

Your partner’s phone should be off limits in general. By showing them that you trust them, you are in turn showing your trustworthiness. No matter how badly your urge, or how “sneaky” they seem to be acting, you should never take it upon yourself to play private investigator. If you suspect they’re doing something untrustworthy, mention that you feel they’ve been a little distant and shady recently.

2. Don’t ask their friends about them

If your mate is doing something shady, like cheating, or seeing their ex, the last people you should ask about it is their friends. If they do know something, you’ll make them feel incredibly uncomfortable, and if they don’t, they’ll end up going back to your mate to share that you don’t trust them. Leave their friends out of it, always.

3. Don’t snoop!

Whether it’s your girlfriend’s purse or your boyfriend’s notebook, the moment you intentionally search their things you become a threat. If they catch you, they’ll never trust you around their things again, and if they don’t, you’ll constantly have issues respecting their privacy. Don’t even let the idea tempt you- if you need something from the purse or notebook, ask them to get it for you, so they know you would never go through their things without asking.

Follow these rules and you’ll have a healthy, trust-filled relationship. And if a bill for AshleyMadison comes in the mail, you’ll be able to say, “I trusted you, and you messed up.”

img @ AskMen

The awkward goodbye after a first date can be really nerve-racking. What do you say? Will there be a kiss? Some hooking up? Maybe you’ll just flat-out get it on cause you met on LavaLife… who knows until you get there. However, if you are planning on ending the date at someone’s front door, your parting words could be an essential factor in whether or not there is a second date. Go with what feels right, but definitely do NOT say any of DatePro’s worst things to say on a first date.

1) “I’ll call you Friday!”

So innocent, you think! But in reality, by setting such a certain date for the next contact, you’re screwing up in two areas: 1) You’re making it “not okay” for them to call you, and 2) You’re not being spontaneous. What if something comes up, or what if you have a great idea for a fun date before then? The fun part of dating is the unknown, and the excitement. By already creating a routine, you’re moving your relationship forward a hefty 6 months. Not fun.

2) ANYTHING that hints at a future.

We know you’d never say, “We can look back on this day on the night of our marriage…” but we seriously mean anything that hints at a future for the two of you, even if it is “I heard you like Thai food, I should take you to this great little place next time…” No. No no no. Women and men both enjoy the thrill of the challenge when they begin dating a person. By leaving it up in the air whether you will meet again, you’re enhancing the excitement and pushing your date to work for your affections.

3) “Do you like me?”

This phrase translates quite simply into “I am extremely insecure.” For either a man or a woman, this is second-date kryptonite, as in a sure fire way to ensure you’ll never get anywhere with them. Assume that they like you (cause who wouldn’t?) and act like it. Confidence beats shyness every time.

After a great first date, the last thing you wanna do is say something that will negate any possibility of a second date. Avoiding these phrases will help you out a whole lot.

img @ datedaily

Dating is such a weird concept. Who invites? Who pays? How long until you call? It’s pretty confusing. After a first date, most women would prefer to wait for the guy to call them again for a second, but sometimes it just doesn’t happen. Should you call him? Of course, there is nothing wrong with a call or text, but the truth is if a guy wanted a second date, he’d probably call. Here are some reasons he might not want a second date.

1. You weren’t grateful.
With sites like WealthyMen and shows like the Real Housewives, sometimes guys are expecting women to be using them for their money, even if they aren’t really well-off. If you’re not very grateful (you can’t really say please and thank you enough), he might assume you weren’t interested, just bored. If you like the guy and are having a good time, be vocal about it. Thank him and let him know you had a really good time. If you don’t say it, how will he know?

2. You were on your phone. The whole time.
As DatePro has discussed before, we know that it’s the 21st century. People have phones with them almost every minute of the day. However, if you’re texting every five minutes, he’s assume you’re not having a good time and telling every one of your girlfriends about it. Instead, be attentive and present, and keep your phone in your purse. Check it after dinner or if you use the restroom. Be polite!

3. You were a prude.
Now, now, we don’t mean you have to put out after the first date. But it’s not the 1800s. You can kiss him after the first date without him thinking you’re some floozy. If you turn away at a kiss, won’t hold his hand, or get offended when he invites you to his apartment, he’s going to think you’re a tease who isn’t interested. Don’t compromise your standards, but show him that you are, in fact, attracted to him.

4. You were annoying.
You whined about your food, you complained about your drink, you rambled about your roommate and after a couple glasses of wine, you cried about your ex. There is nothing attractive about a girl who is self-absorbed and obnoxious. Ask questions, be polite, and be positive.

5. You were too clingy.
Guess what, it’s a first date! You two aren’t engaged; actually, you’re not even in a relationship. So if he talks to another girl, don’t get jealous. And don’t wrap yourself around his arm like a boa constrictor. If you’re already making him feel smothered 3 hours into dating, trust us. There will not be a second date. Guaranteed.

You are a woman, and you got a first date. Be yourself, but keep this tips in mind, and a second date is practically inevitable!

img @ hubpages

There used to be a time when there were set standards for dating- don’t call her right after a first date, wait three dates before sex, blah, blah, blah. It’s finally come to a time where people realize that the question “how long should you wait before having sex?” is practically like asking “how long is a piece of string?” in that there is no right answer.

Sex on the first date, though, is tricky. Some guys say they lose respect for a girl if she goes “all the way” on the first date, and some women feel offended if a guy even tries. To make a judgement call on either part isn’t really appropriate, because everyone views sex differently. For example, on sites like AdultFriendFinder, you’ll probably find a date who assumes sex with happen… But if you meet on BigChurch, that will probably not be the case. The only way to really decide if it’s okay is if you both feel comfortable with the idea.

If maybe you had one too many drinks and you slept with your date when you truly planned on waiting, that’s okay. The last thing you want to say, though, is “I don’t usually do this.” Even if its true, it comes off sounding more like “I do this, and then say this, all the time.” You guys had a fun date, and things got steamy, there is nothing wrong with it. Laugh it off, because if anything, you got a great date, some between-the-sheets fun, and never had to deal with the awkwardness of “the first time.”

A classy restaurant or a dirty dive bar- both can be fun spots to meet up with a date. And whether its been only days or seemingly-forever, there is a certain level of etiquette that should be followed when you’re in public with your date.

The obvious rules pertain to displays of affection, because let’s face it, I don’t care how hot you are, nobody wants to hear your sloppy make out session while trying to enjoy a nice dinner out. Consider the fact that half the people in the building are single, recently single, permanently single, or married for a long time, and the sound of your lip smacking and whispered pronouncements of love, to them, are borderline suicide material. So be considerate of others. The occasional kiss, hand holding, or sitting close is fine, and although you might still be irritating, the truth is they’re just jealous, so… whatever.

Perhaps you met on Adult Friend Finder. While we’re all sure you are going to have a phenomenal night playing out each other’s wildest fantasies, at least keep those behind closed doors. Manual action under the table and R-rated moans in a corner booth are the last thing the general public wants to hear. Keep your hands above the table, have a couple drinks, and then get back to your “plumber and the housewife” fantasy that you arranged online earlier ;).

Of course, it will always be a case by case basis. Sometimes the person you meet may be more on the conservative side, perhaps if you met on a site like Christian Cafe. However, it’s not necessary to sit 2 arms distance apart. This isn’t a middle school dance, and although you want to be true to your faith, being close to one another will create a much more intimate atmosphere. You are in it for love, right?

On the other end of the spectrum, we all know and despise “The Fighting Couple.” You know this situation without even seeing it: it usually sounds like a series of sniffs, followed by piercing shouts, and a lower voice saying “I will walk out of here is you don’t shut up,” over and over.  Fights between couples should be done behind closed doors. Seriously, you’re making everyone in the 10 yard radius seriously uncomfortable. Everyone fights, and everyone’s been there, but no one wants to relive the worst part of relationships while catching rays at the beach.

A basic rule of thumb is to picture yourself in the public’s shoes. Would you want to sit and listen to people argue over whether or not to get salmon or steak for 20 minutes? Probably not. And are you really interested in watching a couple grope each other on the bar stools next to you? Actually… maybe you are. But if that’s the case, head on over to Adult Friend Finder. I’m sure they have the perfect person for you ;).

Text messaging has become one of the most popular and commonly used forms of communication today.  Texting has many advantages including being fast, easy, and to the point.  However, with the good comes the bad, as texting also has some major disadvantages.  The negatives associated with text messaging can be especially prevalent when dealing with dating situations and scenarios.  Dating can be confusing enough and sometimes communicating via text can complicate it further.  However, this is not always the case.  Texting is a great medium for communicating with people you are dating as long as you don’t resort to it for any and all situations.  I am going to lay out a few simple guidelines to follow in regards to texting.  These pointers should help you establish better communication and therefore a better dating experience :).
 
When it’s a good idea to text:
 
 It is ideal to use text messaging when engaging in light-hearted, simple communication.  If you need a one word response to a simple question, texting is perfect.  If you are looking for a more wordy response, pick up the phone and dial.  Texting is also great for showing someone that you are thinking about them.  It takes two seconds and can be done practically anywhere.  It’s a simple act of communication that can make a big impact.  Receiving a nice message during a hectic day from someone special can put a lasting smile on your face.  Texting is the communicative answer to a busy lifestyle and can be very beneficial as long as you use it in moderation.     
 
When you shouldn’t text:
 
One of the downfalls of texting is that your words can be easily misjudged and taken for something that they aren’t.  Due to the fact that we cannot asses the tone of ones voice in a text, the communication can be misleading.  You may be trying to communicate sarcasm in your text and instead it is received as anger.  Emotions are very difficult to accurately relay through text messaging and unfortunately this can lead to confusion.  A good rule of thumb to use is that if you are talking about emotions or feelings, do not text!  The last thing you want is for your partner to misunderstand what it is that you are trying to say.  Just pick up the phone or wait until you are face to face to discuss deeper seeded issues in your relationship.  This way you will be sure to squash any unnecessary drama that miscommunication can create.
 
 Another time when text messaging should not be used is when asking someone out on a first date.  It is fine to use texting for this later in the relationship, but when you are first establishing a connection with someone it is much more polite to call and set up a formal date.  This shows that you are confident and genuine in meeting and getting to know the person.
 
 Lastly, do NOT text when you are on a date!  This can be really hard as some of us (including myself) who are practically addicted to being attached to our phones 24-7.  Although we phone addicts are by no means purposely being rude, texting on your phone every other minute will come across as just that.  It will make your date feel that you are not interested in what they have to say and you will not be able to concentrate on getting to know them and what they have to say.  Bottom line, it’s rude and will not make for a good date.  So, suck it up and turn your phone on silent or leave it in the car so you aren’t tempted to check it throughout the night.

Most of the time this one is a no brainer, so let me begin by explaining the most common first date scenario.  Usually, a guy is going to be the one who initiates the first date.  In this situation, it seems only appropriate for him to pay.  It may come off as a bit old fashioned to expect the man to always pay on a first date, but it only makes sense when he is the initiator.  This way, it is effortlessly established that the man will be the decision maker for the date.  He gets to choose the plan of events and the venues and will therefore have control over the price range.  If he is comfortable with taking his date to the most expensive restaurant in town, then so be it, but he needs to make sure that he can take care of the bill.  There is no worse way to ruin the mood on a date than the awkward situation of figuring out who should pay.  Keep it simple and classy and if you ask a woman to go out with you, make sure you pay in full! 
 
Now…the more unlikely (but increasingly popular) situation that may arise, is a woman deciding that she wants to ask a guy out.  This is beginning to happen more and more as women are becoming more confident in being first-move makers.  While I completely encourage this, it can lead to some confusion when it comes down to who pays the bill at the end of the night.  If a woman offers to pay, most of the time she is just trying to be polite and express that she does not want her date to think she expects him to pay.  However, there will arise situations when the woman genuinely wants to pay for the bill, or at least pitch in.  Some women feel uncomfortable if the guy pays for the entire bill on a first date, especially if it is her idea to go on the date in the first place.  If she offers to pay, politely acknowledge and appreciate the gesture but still try to pay for the bill yourself.  If the woman insists, then suggest to split the bill.  This is a good way to accommodate both parties without making anyone feel uncomfortable.

While this advice should help to establish an effortless payment approach for the first date, please keep this in mind…If your date isn’t worth the money it takes to pay for a first date (which usually consists of two cups of coffee or some drinks and an appetizer), then maybe you should rethink asking them out altogether.  Just keeping it real ;)