img @ lymenaide

As Americans, we live pretty indulgent lives. We’re very impatient, and usually demand instant gratification. As a rule, we are viewed as fat and lazy and a little selfish. There’s not really much one can do to change that perception, but you can make changes in your daily life that will help you become a healthier, happier, and more attractive. One way to do that is to cut back, on many aspects that we take for granted.

1) Eating

Food and water are requirements, of course, but the way we eat is definitely optional. In his book, In Defense of Food, Michael Pollan gives great tips on how to eat healthily without forgoing delicious food, or ever setting food in the freezer section.

2) Alcohol

Happy Hour should be a treat, something you look forward to after a long week at work or on holidays. Once tossing back drinks loses its “hey, this is fun” appeal and becomes an everyday thing, you know you’re drinking too much.

3) TV

TV is awesome, and some  shows genuinely supplement our lives. Even so, it’s gotten to the point where upwards of 4 hours a day are spent sitting on our couches, when there are so many things in the world to be doing. Cutting back on television will allow you the time to do so much more.

4) Time with friends

We’ve all gotten so used to being constantly entertained and engaged that we’ve forgotten the joys of being alone. Although being surrounded by loved ones is great, taking time to be alone and completely at one with your thoughts is a great way to calm yourself.

5) Spending money

If you’re reading this, you’re probably better off that most of the world’s population. Spending money is your reward for working hard, but sometimes it’s nice to give money to those less fortunate than you. Giving to charity, a family member in need, or even just starting a savings account are all ways that you can show some self-control.

img @ activerain

There are some things we all like to keep private, from past relationships to family issues… just things we’d rather not talk about, even with someone we love. That’s okay, because certain things that aren’t anyone’s business but your own.  However, there are other things, that although uncomfortable to talk about, must be approached honestly if you ever want your relationship to work, and here are three.

1. You do/don’t want kids

Whether or not you want children in your life is a big deal for some people. And although discussing the subject is often awkward, as one party might think it’s moving too fast, it could be a dealbreaker for other people. So mentioning, casually, that you’re very much intending to have children (or not), is extremely important.

2. You’re not satisfied in bed

The fake orgasm is something almost 100% of women have had, and although you may think of it as “not a big deal,” men are very offended by it. Be open about your satisfaction and men will be more than happy to oblige. Similarly, gents, if your lady isn’t being as adventurous in bed, she’d appreciate hearing what you want!

3. You’re unhappy

If you’re feeling down, whether it be because of your significant other or not, they would want to know. Keeping feelings to yourself is just bottling them in, which will inevitably lead to an outburst. Being honest about your feelings, no matter how crazy you might think they are, is important to keeping your relationship healthy and happy.

img @ yourtango

Blind dates are the dating world’s equivalent to sky diving or bungee jumping. You have no idea what you’re getting into, you’re nervous and afraid that one screw up could ruin the whole experience (although I suppose you probably wouldn’t die).

Just as with jumping out of a plane or off a platform, there are certain steps you should take to mentally and physically prepare yourself for the excitement that is blind dating… here are a few tips to get your nerves under control, whether you’re meeting a family friend or someone a pal met on Match.com.

1) Get dressed up

Feeling good about the way you look is the first step to enjoying yourself. When you feel attractive, you’re more likely to be confident and self-assured on your date.

2) Drop your expectations

Decide to have fun no matter what the night brings. If anything, your date could be a complete psychopath with no common decency. But hey- imagine the great stories you’ll have for your friends!

3) Laugh

There is always something funny to find in a situation, even if it’s awkward. By letting your serious face go and just enjoying the moment, you’ll find times to laugh and have fun, even if it’s because they’ve had broccoli in their teeth for 30 minutes.

4) Drop the insecurity

Even if you feel uncomfortable with your new haircut or think you won’t be attractive enough for them, keep your head up and don’t bother feeling insecure. On a blind date, it’s your one time to realize that you’ve got NOTHING to lose.

5) Watch the alcohol

A few glasses of wine will loosen you up. 6 of them will make you sloppy and unattractive. Sip slowly and don’t lose your cool, you’ll have a great night!

img @ flickr

During tough economic times, it’s nice to have the option to move back home with your parents and save money so that in a year or two, you can have a bundle of money and start your path towards adulthood. However, it seems as though more and more men these days are making a lifestyle choice to remain immature, living off their parents well into their 30s.

A recent Newsweek article by George Will showed some disturbing statistics, that 13% of men between the ages of 25 and 34 are living with their parents (while only 8% of women do). That might not seem like a lot, but in the dating game, that is significant!

When there is a disconnect between the maturity levels of adult-aged men and women, it makes relationships, dating, and even just hooking up less appealing to both sexes: men thinking women are too serious, women see men as unattractive puberty-stricken little boys.

In his article, George Will discusses the popularity of places like Dave & Busters, a “perpetual refuge from adulthood” where men go to drink beer and play video games and generally escape the monotony of, well, growing up.

Let this be a warning to  men who insist on acting like boys: it’s time to be an adult. You can’t go out looking to pull women when you’re still spending your nights playing Call Of Duty until 5 in the morning. While we all appreciate the single life, enjoying adulthood without the responsibility of marriage and parenthood, there is nothing wrong with taking down your Pamela Anderson posters and considering a career outside of a bar.

Growing up means having a little ambition, a little work ethic, and maybe just a tinge of self-reliance. There is nothing more sexy in the world.

img @ nydailynews

Although online dating has exploded into the mainstream and statistics show some 30% of internet users worldwide have tried online dating, there are still those about who are afraid of (or ashamed to) try an online dating site. Here are a few reasons that those people should take a hard look at themselves and realize that online dating is more than just a fad.

1) Getting to know someone before you meet

Going on dates can be nerve-wracking, especially if it’s a blind date, but by communicating online first, you can get a lot of the awkward parts out of the way, and you can meet for the first time with at least a few ideas for topics of conversation. I don’t know anyone who enjoys the awkardness of the first date, so why wouldn’t you want to get rid of it altogether?

2) Improving your dating skills

We’ve all got weird quirks, silly habits, or nervous ticks that make us feel uncomfortable when dating a new person. When you use an online dating site, perhaps Metrodate or LavaLife, even if you don’t meet the love of your life, at least it gives you the chance to see that dating doesn’t have to be scary. You’ll gain confidence and learn to show your personality without being nervous. It’s like taking a dating class, minus how incredibly lame those are.

3) Broadening your horizons

Most of the people you will meet on dating sites are the type of people that you wouldn’t normally approach or even meet. They might live on the other side of town, go to different coffee shops or bars, or might be very busy students orbusiness people. By exploring different dating sites, you might find someone that is made for you, but that you just would never have encountered in the outside world.

4) Perfect for a busy life

Are you a hard working student? Maybe a business woman with a demanding schedule who can’t get out much? Either way, online dating is perfect for the busy man or woman. You can check your dating profile any time, day or night, and chat with singles in your precious few minutes before planning your date.

5) Saves money

Although most dating sites charge a monthly or yearly fee, the amount of money people usually spend on dating, what with drinks, clothes, dinners, presents, and more, ends up costing tons more. WIth online dating you can get to know people before you start dropping the big bucks on them.

Saving money, meeting quality people, and making the most of your time? Can you even think of a reason that online dating isn’t beneficial?

img @ osborn photo

Been feeling sluggish recently? Walking slow, having a hard time getting out of bed, getting sleepy around 3 in the afternoon? You’re not alone. Ask anyone and they’d probably say they wish they had more energy. Here are a few quick, healthy ways to boost your energy level without much effort.

1. Keep your workouts early

That cup of coffee (or eight) that you’ve been relying on to wake up could be the reason you’re actually tired! Instead of using caffeine to get you through the day, try waking up a little early and getting in a workout, even if it’s just a quick 15 or 20 minute run, you’ll instantly feel energetic and fueled for the day. Plus, working out too close to your bedtime will make you tired, in fact it will get your blood pumping and your brain moving so fast you might have a harder time falling asleep.

2. Utilize citrus

The smell of citrus is shown to have dramatic effects on the brain, as its potent smell wakes up the senses! For men, this might mean keeping a citrus scented oil or candle in your house to take a quick whiff of, and for women, this could mean using a grapefruit scented body wash in the morning!

3. Change your socks

Sounds strange, right? But according to some Zen living principles, changing your socks when you start to feel fatigued can instantly give you a boost of energy!

4. Make sleep about quality, not quantity

According to recent studies, the human body can get by on an average of 5 hours of sleep, but that should be good solid, real sleep, so practice healthy sleeping patterns by trying to fall asleep on your own, without the TV on, and without sleep aids.

5. Hydrate!

There are very few people around who get the daily recommended water intake. Keeping a big jug of water filled throughout the day, with a lemon wedge, can keep you from feeling lethargic and tired, thus making you more productive throughout your day.

We’ve gone over the online dating “Dos” a million times: DO post a great picture, DO be thorough in your profile, DO be honest with your date and yourself. However, there are also a few adamant “Don’ts” that should be gone over in full. Here are DatePro’s top 5 online dating mistakes.

1. Thinking one great date actually meant something

Sure, you met up, you had a fun date, great conversation, and maybe even something physical afterwards, but one great date doesn’t mean you’re made for each other, or in love, or even dating. Online dating’s benefits lie in the aspect of options. By not exploring other options (while keeping that great date in mind) is a waste of whatever money you put into the site. Set up another date, sure, but don’t assume that one great date means you should stop looking.

2. Expecting your date’s profile to be 100% accurate

While we stressed the importance of honesty, we also accept that people are human, and they might stretch the truth about their age or weight or income. People want to be given a chance, and you shouldn’t be surprised if they aren’t exactly like they claimed to be. Don’t let this be a reason you get to know your date. You might realize that the little white lie doesn’t really compare to how great a person they are.

3. Narrowing your options by writing “dislikes”

While you might think that you’re making sure you only get approached by people that fit your standards, but like we noted earlier- the great part about online dating is that you’re meeting people who you would might not ever approach in real life. Open up your options, and leave out the “don’t approach me” lines. Your profile should be positive and should say who you are interested in, not who you don’t want.

4. Signing up for a one-month subscription

Only giving yourself one month to find someone great is a sure fire way to disappoint yourself, and set yourself up for failure. An open ended subscription to a site like Chemistry.com or Yahoo! Personals will not only be cheaper, but will take the pressure off and give you a better chance of finding and meeting some great person.

5. Believing going on tons of dates without finding “The One” is a failure.

First dates are exciting, a little nerve-wracking, but fun and confidence-inspiring. The more dates you go on, the better you will get at figuring out what you want in a relationship. Plus, you’ll meet great people who you might end up dating again in the future! If anything, meeting one person and then marrying them is the worst route to go, because who knows if you might find someone better?

Get out there, be confident, and stay positive. Online dating is easier that you think!

The first date is critical because the pressure is on to make a good first impression.  Although you may feel compelled to plan some outrageous escapade in attempt to impress your date, slam on the brakes and put that on hold for a later time.  You don’t want to waste an amazing date idea on someone who you may not be that into, right?  So, be more realistic and save all the bells and whistles for someone who has earned your special treatment ;)
 
The first date is your opportunity to quickly feel out the other person and recognize whether or not you are compatible and have chemistry.  In order to figure this out, you need to be able to talk freely.  With that being said, make sure you do not take a first date to the movies or to a ridiculously loud and overcrowded bar, sporting event, or concert where you will not be able to say a word to each other the entire time.  A better choice for a first date is a coffee shop or a low key restaurant or lounge.  These locations will give you the opportunity to focus on your date and judge whether or not they are a good match for you.
 
Remember, we do not live in the fantasy world of The Bachelor, where first dates consist of flying to Paris on a private jet followed by a candle lit dinner at the top of the Eiffel tower.  Of course the sparks between two people are going to fly in this situation!  When a date is so elaborate and romantic it’s nearly impossible to not become distracted from everything else going on.  The focus is taken off of getting to know your date and becomes centered on the ambiance of the experience at hand.  This is an extreme situation, but the point is that the first date should be kept light, easy going, and casual.  This way you will be able to really focus on discovering whether or not your date is someone who you would like to see again.

It’s always difficult to know how to act towards an ex after you break up. When you are used to being so involved in someone’s life, it’s a serious challenge knowing where and how you fit in it post break up. As great as it would be to effortlessly jump from a romantic relationship into a platonic friendship with your ex, this never happens without complications. When deciding whether to remain friends or just burn your bridges, you need to consider several critical issues.

First of all, how did the break up go down? Was is a mutual thing or was it a one-sided decision? Did the two of you simply grow apart and want different things or did someone make a mistake that was unforgivable? Unfortunately, relationships are complicated and breakups even more so. No two breakups are ever the same, that’s why there is never one “correct” way to approach your ex. For example, if your relationship ended because you cheated on your significant other, then they will probably have a lot of animosity towards you and will want to cut you out of their life. On the other hand, if your relationship slowly fizzled and you mutually agreed to to break up, then the whole friendship thing might be a plausible option.

The best approach is to feel out the situation and realistically determine where you stand in terms of your feelings and emotions. In most breakup situations, it takes time to heal any hurt, confusion, or frustration that you or your ex may be experiencing. There is rarely a clean break when it comes to ending relationships and it’s never easy to let go of someone that was a prevalent part of your life. However, it’s important to be honest with yourself and figure out what you truly want to gain or lose from the breakup. If you think you could have a future with this person but the timing is just off, then it might be wise for you to try and maintain a friendship with them just in case something were to develop later on. On the other hand, if you honestly know you have no feelings left for this person and are totally checked out, it might be best to make the cleanest cut possible and burn the bridge, at least for the time being.

When a relationship ends, it is rarely completely mutual; one person is likely to want something more or different than the other. This is where things can get complicated because if one person wants a friendship but the other wants more, someone is likely to be misled. As hard as it may be to walk away from someone you loved or cared greatly for, sometimes that is the best possible thing you can do. In order for people to heal, grow, and move on from a break up, time and space is essential. While you may feel that you are burning a bridge, in reality you are just putting your and your ex’s best interest at heart by choosing to let time take its course. Down the road, you may be able to establish a friendship with this person again, and this time it wont be flooded with confusing emotions.

Whatever choice you make, whether it be to remain friends or to burn bridges, just remember that life has a time and place for everything. Whether you are aware of it or not, when someone leaves your life it is because another opportunity is entering it. Always be honest and upfront with your feelings and make the best possible decision for the future of both yourself and your ex.